Consequences

I was having dinner with some friends last night. I love such opportunities to spend time with real families, including the real possibility of life happening right before our eyes. As the plates of pasta were served, one of the children made it abundantly clear that he was not impressed with the choice of the particular pasta that was prepared.

At first the parents tried their best to reason with him (the child in question is old enough to make decisions for himself, and is more than capable of reasoning rationally), but no amount of talking would convince him that this type of pasta was as edible or could be just as enjoyable as another. He chose to quietly munch away at some bread, but hardly touched his food.

Some parents might allow him to get away with this; not these ones. Both mom and dad noticed that his dish was still rather full, and the comment was made that if he would have to finish the meal or else he was not going to receive any dessert. Worse yet, if he was hungry after the meal was complete, the same plate of pasta would be waiting, and any leftovers would also be sent to school tomorrow for lunch.

Consequences are a good thing, and consistency is more important than you might think when it comes to disciplining. My parents taught me that lesson, and I sometimes shake my head when I see how many parents today don't stick to their guns when it comes to this rather unpleasant part of parenting.

In the realm of relationships, discipline can often teach us much more about ourselves and the way we nurture friendships. When God disciplines, the consequences are sometimes truly unpleasant, but the result is always a discipline that calls us into closer intimacy. I think that deep down, that's the aim of all our relationships.

How often do we look back, even many years later, and remember the moments of discipline as times when we were actually bonded even closer with those we love?